We left on a Sunday morning following Emma's dance recital the previous night. I managed to have everyone packed and ready to walk out the front door at a glaring 5:30 in the morning.
My peacock feathers were opened up for the world to see.
If I fail to mention Benjamin's rash it will come up later ... because it only got worse. At this point in our trip I was convinced it was something as simple as sun poisoning or an allergic reaction ... I was convinced and somewhat delusional.
As Chris parked the truck in shuttle parking I went to check our 10 pieces of luggage with the airlines.
What's that? Checking luggage cost money?
Pfft. Nonsense. Bologna. Crazy talk.
Um. Guess what Proud Peacock Momma had no clue about on her "Oh-So-Well-Planned-Out" vacation?
Please do not take this opportunity to tell me about how everyone knows the airlines charge for baggage. I will then take the opportunity to ask you HOW?
I watch very little television. I am not a world traveler. When my husband travels for work he always takes one carry-on piece.
TELL ME HOW I WAS SUPPOSED TO KNOW THIS???
I booked through Travelocity and there was nary a mention of such an atrocity.
Had I been even remotely aware of this gouging I would not have encouraged my children to Surely! Pack your stuffed animals in an entire suitcase! Bring your blankies! I love to pay money for senseless things!
It sort of knocked me off kilter for a bit.
The airlines encouraged me to carry a couple of more bags on with me, which we did.
Here is a piece of helpful advice. Luggage carts are available at the Richmond Airport for arrival only. If you have four children and 6 carry-on pieces you might should consider how you shall get to and fro.
My husband is glad I shared that. His back and forearms are forever changed.
By the time we had everyone barefoot and ready to go through security I felt like we might just be okay.
Until she brought me an item from the above mentioned suitcase (brand new bottle of sunscreen) and another item (brand new bottle of lotion) and then another item (brand new bottle of dishwashing liquid) and then another item (brand new bottle of Wrinkle Release).
As my body began to convulse, I threw the unopened bottles into the trash can.
Apparently, in my zeal for packing early, I had forgotten a few of these oddly placed items.
I've taken the baby out of the stroller, folded it up and we have made our way through the "I can see your insides" archway and have started to try and gather our massive mound of carry-on.
Big Daddy is soooo thankful that I saved an extra $50 and carried that luggage on the plane ... he told me so.
In a sort-of sarcastic tone.
As the very unhappy and angry-to-have-a-job airport employee tested Benjamin's milk for Agent Orange, I decided to make light of the situation with a teensy little joke.
"So. Do you ever have people break down in tears at this point?"
(thinking to myself ... DON'T YOU CRY YOU BIG BABY ... it's just Wrinkle Release for crying out loud)
To which she responded:
"Uh. No ... E-REE-BODY knows the rules."
(while her eyes rolled back in her head)
Let the floodgates open.
The ugly cry began and I thought my oldest was going into a tiger-like pounce position, so we made our way to the gate.
I am blubbering all the way.
"IIIII ... tttried (snort, snot, snort) sssssooo ... hhhhard (snort, snort) I ... cccan'ttt ... bbbelieve (snort, huff, huff, huff)
Hannah has now grown about 6-inches and would like a word with the airport employee ...
Things calmed down rather quickly as I gave up my snubbing & sobbing session.
The flight was uneventful and I even had an extra seat for Benjamin. These pictures show off his splendid rash and precious lovin' session with Daddy ...