Inward Cleanliness

By the world's standards, my children are well-behaved. They are usually well-mannered and practice adequate levels of self-control and respect...well at least the older ones do ;)

Still. They challenge me in many ways as a mother and we had have our fair share of battles regarding will, respect, obedience, selfishness, diligence, pride....You get the drift?

These are matters of the heart. More often than not, the struggle part has everything to do with my own sin of pride and sense of entitlement.

Because I am "The Mutha".

The problem with this is that I am failing on a daily basis. It is not easy to balance on the pedestal when I lose my temper and pop off for the 87th time with the infamous one-liner...

"THAT'S ENOUGH!"

Clearly, I am falling short and missing the mark. The truth of God's Word says that we are unworthy and unrighteous.

We have all become like one who is unclean,
and all our righteous deeds are like a polluted garment.
We all fade like a leaf,
and our iniquities, like the wind, take us away.

Isaiah 64:6

So it is not who I am but rather who He is that warrants respect. It is not me or even the role of mother that requires obedience but it is God and his Word.

Having children should produce humility. I polish and shine so that their appearance will reflect the "goodness" of my mothering. The truth is, it is a reflection of the sinful pride in my heart.

They are the outside of my cup (Matthew 23:25-16).

From Tabletalk:

Repeated washings should remind the washer of his perpetual dirtiness and help him long for a clean heart.

God uses my sons and daughters as a reminder that He is in the business of clean hearts. My efforts for good behavior will be in vain if my first motive is not purity of the heart....for us all.

"The children of God ought to desire to be pure rather than to appear so."
-John Calvin