Monday, August 18, 2008

Turning The Page

Have you ever caught a glimpse of your life and in a split second it looks like a far-away memory?

The sun beats down on the freckled bridge of your daughter's nose and you gasp, because after 11 years of always appearing like the "little girl", she suddenly does not?

I love to take pictures because I cannot bear the thought of losing a treasured moment in time.

When I see that face that looks so much older than it should.

When I watch her hold my baby in such a natural and maternal way and I realize she is as closer to being grown than she is to being my baby.

It makes me ache inside so badly that I wrestle with the emotions and I long to see that cherub face again.

So I look for pictures that let me visit for a while.
Today, I caught a glimpse of a memory and I took a picture because I wanted to remember little E and her love for gymnastics.

It was while I was completing the daunting task of preparing Emma's leotards to sell at the gym.

I am okay with the turning of that page. Gymnastics is jealous sport. It requires more of the child than most parents would be willing to give up. Definitely more than we were willing to give up. Gratefully even more than she was willing to give up, so the choice was hers before it had to be ours.

Still. Every time I turn a page in the lives of my children I start to reel through the season that has just passed and how quickly it went by....

And I try desperately to cling contently to the one we are in.

5 comments:

Jill said...

Oh, I so know what you mean. I took a look at my almost 12yo son and suddenly he looks more like a man than a boy. When did that happen?

Wendy said...

I can so relate to this! The time is going so fast w/our kids.
Our #2 is in love w/gymnastics, so what you wrote made me think more about that too.

Jill said...

Have you been peeking in my windows? Or at least the window of my heart.
I so miss "those days" with the older kids, but it has taught me to cherish those moments with the youngest. I'm realizing how fast those days go by.

Kim said...

Yes, I can relate! It seems it is in times of closing doors to things, that we look back and see it is actually a chapter in their lives...and time goes on.

A little heartbreaking. But, at the same time...exciting for us all to see what God has in store for them in the future!

Your children are beautiful!

Anonymous said...

I've been turning a big page this week. A year ago Monday, the packers arrived on Eastfair. A year ago today, we headed to Maryland for good. It's hard to stop looking back, the crick in my neck proves it. I miss you friend and am so grateful you are always close, L