Mercy Days

Quick Update ...

2012-01-20T23:50:00.004-05:00

Visit with Wound Care Center and Dr. Boykin went very well. Learned how to take good care of her little foot and we will visit with him again next week (and following weeks) until it is completely healed.
Found out that doctors & nurses get mighty nervous when a momma brings the FO-TOs with her, documenting the progression of her baby's wounds as well as the poorly wrapped splint. Kind of leaves them speechless. See how being a neurotic pitcher-taker has it's advantages?
Clara is so much happier and already feels a TON better. We haven't had prescription pain medicine all day and this is the first full day since Sunday. The pressure and support of the boot feels good to her and she DOES NOT like to take it off.
She knows the Jahnke Road exit all too well and starts to well up when we turn in that direction. :(
It's good to know that I wasn't the only momma who got to the boiling point over this whole ordeal. I am very grateful for the kindness and empathy that has been shown to us by the Chippenham hospital staff, since we had our little "conversation." (link)
And glory-hallelujah, she can take a bath tomorrow!

***And best of all ... Daddy is home!***

He flew in early today so we had him for dinner and bedtime tonight, which was an added treat. Looking forward to spending tomorrow together :)

Under Pressure

2012-01-19T22:47:00.001-05:00

Clara went to the orthopedist yesterday for what we thought would be a visit to remove her splint and put on a cast to help her toe to heal.

When the temporary splint was removed we found a very ugly pressure wound on her heal. The splint was put on incorrectly by the emergency room nurse on Saturday and extensive pressure was put on her heel. Unbeknownst to us, it has been the primary source of her pain.

It has broken my heart over & over again, thinking about her writhing and crying out in such anguish, these last few days. We thought it was her toe that was giving her such fits.

I am exhausted in countless ways. I spent the better part of the morning speaking harshly to those who were in charge of the responsible parties, doctors & nurses alike, pleading with them to consider this mistake a very important problem to remedy ... THEIR problem. It was nasty at times and I am sure if salvation could be lost in a telephone conversation, mine is gone forever.

(oh, so thankful for grace)

After a visit with the Pediatric ER this afternoon and several properly concerned doctors, nurses and folks from administration, we have a suitable plan for getting this foot healed up. We meet tomorrow with the doctor at the wound care center for what may be a long process.

Thankful that she is feeling so much better already!

You can tell in this pic how she will flex her right foot

but keeps the left foot more pointed.

Notice the splint on the left having more of a 90-degree angle. Clara's foot was left in a downward position and then bound that way.

Phony Pics

2012-01-17T23:37:00.001-05:00

Having a camera in my pocket has proven to be handy on many occasions and now that Hannah has her own iPhone we are double the trouble. Of course she takes way more pics than I do and of things I would NEVER take pictures of (like the BLESSED laundry!)

It tickles me to see some of what makes the cut ;)

This is sorted laundry. It's our way of making progress

when you know that FOLDING is asking a bit much.

Fear does not exist in this dojo, DOES IT??

Broken toe and a bad case of the coo-coos.

She has lived out "fit to be tied" like I have never seen.

Emma made these. Pecan Meltaways.

Oh, they melted away alright.

It's disturbing and amazing at the same time.

Kind of like my life.

They stay entertained back there.

Seriously? With a cell phone?

LOVE.

Aw, the good ol' days.

When she wore both boots.

Emma made these too. She loves me.

Peanut butter cookies with little Reese's Cups.

She is Sugar Britches.

Okay?

Like this.

I like to call this one, "NO BEN-BEN! IT'S MINE"

That is basically the theme song of their relationship.

This Little Piggy ...

2012-01-17T16:37:00.001-05:00

Dad came home early Saturday morning to start off our 30-Hours-With-Dad! weekend. Gosh, with sleeping it seemed like so much less!

Saturday morning we got up super early to see the girls off, as they left for the Focus Conference. The younger three were way too excited to sleep in and we spent the morning together before heading to Sam's basketball game.

Afterwards, we came home, ate lunch and then I left to run a couple of errands.

Chris called as I was leaving the cleaners, and said to come home immediately. Clara had hurt her foot really bad and there was a lot of blood.

Gracious.

From what we can tell, she pulled the piano bench over and it landed on her foot. The bleeding made it impossible to see what kind of damage had been done but she was pretty good at letting us know we needed to head on to the hospital.

Chris stayed with the boys and I took Clara to Chippenham Hospital where they have a pediatric ER. We were seen quickly and the x-ray revealed that her big piggy was broken. An open fracture to be exact, because the skin was open at the break. Where the toenail meets the foot, the nail (with the pressure of the bench) punctured the skin and then broke the top portion of her toe.

She was a very sweet patient. She cried sweetly when anyone spoke to her ... and she cried like a wild animal when they cleaned that nasty wound. I sang a few dozen rounds of Jesus Loves Me, The Wheels on the Bus and My Father's World. We were both drenched in sweat after that little episode and after they wrapped her up in a make-shift splint she was good to go :)

Took me back about 12 or 13 years ago when I held my Emma in a mummy restraint singing those same songs. She left a piece of her forehead on Dusty's kitchen counter and we had them stitch her forehead closed. I remember them telling me that it would be better if I waited outside because it would be too hard for me to stay with her.

Ummmm ... That's dumb advice. I'll sit right here and you fix my baby so we can go, thank-you-very-MUCH.

They gave us antibiotic to prevent infection and narcotics for the pain.

I think it makes good sense to give the mother at least a dose or two for the night, don't you?

I will take Clara to the orthopedist on Wednesday ... Dr. Christopher Kim.

Let's stay right here for just a minute and enjoy the ridiculousness.

Tex, her trusty physical therapist

(I think he just hopes she drops food at some point)

They will do additional x-rays and decide what to do before putting her in a cast, possibly a bone reduction? ... At which point I may need a stiff drink and a designated driver.

She cycles in and out of pain and her patience level is just about tapped out. Like when she is sitting on the couch and just hollers out as loud she can ... "MAAAMAAA! I CAN'T WAAAAALK!!!"

She doesn't actually want to get up at that point but rather remind me and anyone else within earshot of her woeful condition ;)

Chris left Sunday around lunchtime for the week, and the girls just got home last night. We have had an interesting couple of days around here ;) My sweet neighbor has picked up groceries and taken Benjamin to play when things were crazy Monday morning. Jamie came Sunday night and brought dinner and stayed until bedtime. She took Sam back with her to their house where he had the time of his ever-lovin' life.

Thank you Jamie!

He was tearing up last night and I thought maybe he was missing Dad, or worried about Clara, or maybe he had even missed me? ... but NO. He missed Carson ... and I think they had just pulled out of the driveway ;)

So we have to keep Sugar Britches still as much as possible, which you can tell by the video is no easy feat. Once the cast gets on we can let her be a little more mobile.

Who would have thought that a piano bench and a big toe could cause so much trouble?

The Weekend

2012-01-14T00:13:00.001-05:00

Up tonight getting the girls ready for a weekend away with their youth group. They are going to the FOCUS conference in Asheville, NC and will be back Monday night. I am so excited for them! I am so freaking out that I will be here without any big people for 2 days!

Chris has been working out of town for 6 weeks (3 weeks down, 3 more to go!). He comes home tonight or actually early morning because his flight was delayed. He leaves again Sunday.

Stinks to high heaven but the days go by fast. I do feel myself start to come unwound about this point each week. Knowing that he is almost here ... and knowing he won't be here long enough.

Me and that fella have spent the better part of our life together. We can have some pretty gnarly "discussions" and we aren't always as good to each other as we should be.

But I love him oh-so-much & I MISS HIM when he is not here. For goodness sakes I miss him when he goes to work each day ... gone for a week is too dog-gone long.

Poor thing has a pretty long list of stuff to accomplish in just a little over 24 hours ;)

Including lots of hugs & kisses from this clan ...

And we'll see if this one lets him outta her sight for a split second ;)

Resolving Things a Bit ...

2012-01-13T02:25:00.000-05:00

I have lofty goals ... they include me losing weight AND being more kind to the people who live here.

Pretty lofty, I know.

My thoughts are scattered. Hold on tight.

My oldest is getting older. Well, they are all getting older but she is definitely getting to be too old TOO fast. I make peace with that and then I feel my eyeballs start to leak & swell shut. And then my heart falls into my gut.

There went the peace.

Say what you will about being thankful for the good times, but I don't wanna think about this house without the 7 of us in it.

I know He'll meet me there when the time comes.

For this I am sure of.

I have seen Him meet the broken-hearted a time or two these past few months ... and He never shows up a second too late. Oh, how I wish I could write more poignantly about it.

It seems impossible. But, she does a beautiful job of it.

I ran errands today with the three younger kids. Sam took notice of the print on the McDonalds bag.

"I wanna go there! To the Ronald McDonald house! Is it like a big Mcdonalds?"

I tell him no. It is like a hotel but it looks more like a house. It is for families with sick children. They can stay there while their children are in the hospital.

I tell him that sweet Lydia stayed at the Ronald McDonald house with her family when they went to see the doctor last year at UNC.

(what he had read from the bag)

"When Scottie got sick he had to fly to a hospital far away.

Ronald McDonald House gave his family a place to stay close by.

With his family near, Scottie got better quicker...

so he could go back home."

"Yeah ... but it says on the bag that Scottie got better and Lydia ... Lydia didn't get better."

I wish my heart had not skipped so many beats. I wished I had thought to tell him that Lydia was better. Better than she had ever been and better than we will ever be!

Glory! How do I land here when I start off with weight loss and being sweet?

My girls have been reading through old posts on my blog. They were too young to care too much when I started ;) It has been a sweet time of remembering and it has blessed me to be reminded! Heavy moments like today and sweet moments sprinkled with memories make me think hard.

I want to pause and rest with the thoughts of my 9-year old boy when his heart is heavy. I want to avoid the ever-present rushing through my life. I want to be content more and compare less.

I want to wake up and not open my laptop before I open my bible.

When I spend time purposing to recall the most beautiful parts ...

It points me to His work in my life ...

In their lives ...

Facebook has been such an amazing thing. Amazing at connecting and drawing people together.

And amazing at sucking literal hours away from my life.

I cannot begin to tell you how I have struggled with whether or not I should remove myself from that world. I have really good arguments for both. I have really only validated the one side up until now.

I am taking my first Facebook hiatus.

Not sure how long. Can't think about the implications for too long either. I'll be posting here more often, though!

I have to do something with all these pictures of Sugar Britches.

Once Upon a Time

2012-01-03T22:51:00.001-05:00

Once upon a time, there was a little sass-a-frass ...

She thought she was 9 or 27 years old.

She loved to priss & prance her way through the day.

Sometimes she was too big for her britches.

or her knee socks.

She thought she was 9 or 27 ... but she was only 2.

I think the dress made her feel older.

... Once Upon a Time

Perspective

2011-12-30T14:48:00.004-05:00

Hannah took this picture with her phone.

I love it.

2011-12-07T13:31:00.001-05:00

Lydia Gray Byrd

Grief

2011-11-02T16:13:00.002-04:00

It was about a year ago that I met Stacey & Willie Byrd at church after the second service. I'd be lying if I said I did not first notice her gorgeousness, but as soon as she spoke I fell in love with all the rest. There was the quick protocol exchange of stats ... children, ages, where they were from, etc.

And as she spoke of her Lydia, all the Sunday morning fellowship noise in that church suddenly became silent to me.

Her little first grade beauty had been diagnosed the prior year with an inoperable brain tumor. As the details spilled forth, I listened and I waited ... for the happy ending.

But the tumor was still there. Treatment was over. The season of waiting had begun.

Stacey's voice was full of hope and she had such a sense of security that I did not find myself searching for a sympathetic response. I did however, find myself drawn to her, her lovely family, and her sweet and sincere faith.

We stopped for lunch that very day at a Mexican restaurant on the way home and lo & behold! That cute little Byrd family was already there :) We joined tables and the blessing of our friendship journey began.

A blessing indeed.

I have likened these last few months to something like soldiers sharing time together in battle. Strangers only for a moment. A quick baring of souls.

There wasn't time for shallow conversations or insecurities.

God made a way for intimate conversations. Lengthy conversations.

Hard conversations.

She and Willie were on the front lines. I waited in the trenches with countless others, ready at a moments notice to respond to their needs. So many who love them have been faithful to pray and also stand ready to serve.

Having a front row seat to this sort of trial has provided special insight in ministering and caring for a grieving friend but:

1.) I am no expert. I'm just a friend. A very broken and humbled friend who hopes to share in some way that might encourage.
2.) My experience (as well as theirs) is unique, as is every single grief process.
3.) We are at the beginning of a long journey. As we reach different milestones I assume that the process will change shape and with those changes, needs may be different as well.

Molly Piper (daughter-in-law to John Piper) speaks about grief after the loss of their first baby girl, Felicity. I urge you to take the time and read through the series that she has written about helping a grieving friend (click on the red bolded words) While Stacey and Willie are on a different grief journey from the Pipers, much of what Molly writes about really resonates with them and their experience thus far. She has shared, far better than I could, how this difficult burden can be made lighter with the sweet love of caring friends.

My own grieving process is almost 20 years old now. I was 19 when my mother passed away from cancer ... my little brother was 12. She was my whole world.

These tips resonate with me too.

Grief is careful to hold a place in your heart ... it's familiarity almost mocking you, as if you thought it was gone forever. It is common ground for mankind and reminds us quickly that we are in great need of rescue. And here we have common ground for the believer ...

Our rescuer has already come! And death does not have the final say.

With the promise of salvation and eternity with Jesus, we have to claim joy and thanksgiving as often as our hearts can be convinced!

One last bit of advice if you find yourself in the precious position of caring for a friend who is grieving. Avoid the downtrodden face, sad voice, and forlorn or gloomy demeanor ... especially when making initial contact or when the family is out in public. It takes a great deal of courage to face the everyday world when your everyday has forever been changed. The last thing that a grieving person needs is to be quickly reminded that their presence makes people sad. Rather, be a reminder that God promises beauty for ashes and joy in the morning! He intends for our broken hearts to be healed and what better way to start than to be a loving encouragement.

Blessings,

Shane and Shane

2011-10-12T20:57:00.002-04:00

Chris took the girls to a FREE Shane and Shane concert on Saturday night. They met up with the youth group from Grace and drove up to Woodbridge, VA. We have LOVED Shane and Shane for a long time so being able to see them in concert was a real treat!

Their new album, The One You Need, does not disappoint and we have all fallen in love with Grace is Sufficient.

Pray for Lydia

2011-09-28T22:12:00.004-04:00

I know there are a few people left in the blog world who don't read Facebook and I also know that some of those are praying people.

There is a very special family that needs your prayers. Stacey & Willie are precious friends of ours and their sweet Lydia is walking through some hard days right now. You can read her story at their blog here:

Byrds' Nest

They are in Chapel Hill this week with Lydia and we get the awesome privilege of loving on their ADORABLE boys. These boys have filled our house with joy and laughter and we are blessed ... I mean truly blessed to have them here! My poor children are going to go into withdrawals when they realize that this is not where Luke & Sam will live forever. Good luck Ma & Pa Byrd gettin' these boys outta here without a fight!

Reading just a few posts on the Byrds' blog and you'll see this is not your typical family. I mean after you get over the fact that they ALL have perfect hair, it is their hearts for Him that leave the greatest impression. It is hard to write about this family without using a lot of cliche words that are thrown around and overused. Words like faith and strength.

This typical Christianese that we reserve for hard times ... or close football games should be kept on a tighter leash. So that when people like Stacey & Willie Byrd get slammed with devastating news and they stand upright in the midst of a catastrophic storm, we can say ... now THAT is faith.

Stacey shares her heart in a way that is so soothing and disconcerting at the same time. I am comforted that God is providing that fortress of protection for them and reminded that truly resting in His sovereignty is the only way to have any real peace. Her heart of thankfulness overflows with His goodness ... but I leave with a unsettled churning, an ache of sorts for something more.

If there is rest in such calamity as theirs, why do I find myself so restless ... so often? With so much to be thankful for, why must I fight such losing battles with my flesh?

God is using Lydia ... and her Momma & Daddy to bring about a revival of gratitude. See, it isn't just being thankful that our kids are okay, or that we have good jobs, nice homes, or winning teams.

Being thankful and finding rest are about HIM. If knowing Him means trusting Him ... and trusting Him means believing the gospel then how are we ever *not* thankful?

Stacey always says (with her NC twang), "that tha other stuff jus gets in tha way".

So tonight, I am thankful for a desire (that comes from Him) to start removing "tha other stuff" because I am desperate for gratitude that overflows in my heart.

We love you so, Byrd family. It hurts my heart more than you know to not have you here to hug but I know you are safe in that sweet embrace of the Lord and it does suffice so much better.

The one who offers thanksgiving as his sacrifice glorifies me;

to one who orders his way rightly I will show the salvation of God!"

-Psalm 50:23

Mercy Days 2011-2012

2011-09-15T07:25:00.000-04:00

Our Students

11th grade

9th grade

3rd grade

Preschool - 3 years old

Preschool - One Year old

(okay, so she turns 2 next month but

she's still a 1 year old for now!)

She is shocked that the 2nd birthday is coming so fast too!

Or maybe she is shocked because her sister

(who was only 1 years old, like yesterday) is driving already!!!

The Best of Times (so why do I cry so much?)

2011-07-29T22:47:00.001-04:00

While looking for something under his bed I found an old pacifier of Benjamin's.

And then I found myself fighting back tears because another baby has begun the steady creep out of babyhood.

Then I gave up the fight.

I'm too tired from cleaning up walls that are marked with poop & permanent markers.

Of course that brought on a different kind of crying all together.

{pretty, happy, funny, real}

2011-06-30T13:32:00.002-04:00

{pretty}

inside & out

{happy}

he plays ... she dances

{funny}

this face is one of her favorites

... and one of ours too!

{real}

This is Clara running around in a swimsuit

with no diaper on after an evening with friends.

Little did we know that she had a very messy poop

"situation" that we ended up trying to clean up in the dark.

Not fun but very real.

For more {pretty, happy, funny, real} posts click here!

Father's Day - 2011

2011-06-20T10:12:00.000-04:00

{pretty, happy, funny, real}

2011-06-13T10:56:00.000-04:00

{pretty}

recital time

nature boy

{happy}

she's always happy when she's in the girls' bedrooms ...

he's always happy when he is outside with other boys ...

he's pretty much always happy ...

she's also happy when she is footloose & fancy free ...

{funny}

these are *some* of the outtakes from Mother's Day

{real}

More wonderful pics that are {pretty, happy, funny, real} here!

What To Say ...

2011-06-13T09:27:00.000-04:00

So we took a two week trip to Texas ... 60+ hours in the car ... nearly 4,000 miles.

I could write about that.

Samuel finished up his baseball season and had his 2nd piano recital.

I could write about that.

I went to the homeschool convention here in Richmond. We (the Homeschool Mom's Gone Wild) spent the night and spent a lot of of money too.

I could write about that. (And the curriculum! I could always write about curriculum!)

I could write about our school year (10th, 8th, & 3rd grades respectively) and how it went.

I could write about cell phones, facebook, iPads, iTouches, iPhones, dating, modesty, responsibility, college, raising expectations, drivers ed or a dozen other topics that come from raising teen girls.

We went to Morefield Mines.
Emma danced in 5 numbers for her recital.
We celebrated Mother's Day.
Benjamin had an unsuccessful day (first attempt) at potty training.
Clara thinks she is 15 and has great affection for Monster Trucks and beaded necklaces.

I could write about all that too.

See my dilemma?

So until I decide, here are some pics!

Daddy's Home!

2011-06-12T15:25:00.000-04:00

April ... in pieces (also known as: MAN WE'VE BEEN BUSY!)

2011-05-18T23:37:00.000-04:00

She turned 14.

We went out for lunch after church for her birthday.

It always seems like a good idea.

It usually turns out to be quite the fiasco.

We do it anyway because tradition trumps toddler-tantrums.

Later, we won't remember the tantrums.

We'll just remember that she turned 14.

And that they weren't toddlers very long.

We ran in the Monument Avenue 10-K again.

Sam & Dad ran in the Kids 1-mile.

VCU just happened to make it to the Final Four.

Pretty much everybody in this city was a fan :)

Babies cheering on Hannah & Mom ...

Bless their hearts, somehow they missed us :(

Hannah & Amy

One of the many costumed runners ...

All tuckered out.

Emma celebrated her birthday with friends the following weekend ...

First: Sweet Frog Yogurt

Then back to our house!

Emma & Elyse have the same birthday!

Any ideas for what to do about this?

The whole "growing up" thing?

Cause it's gettin' outta control, ya'll.

Guess what? My kids are growing up.

2011-05-02T00:09:00.000-04:00

Finally framed our school pics from this year ... and yes I have had them for approximately 5 months.

But I did it!

I keep the old pics behind the new ones in the same frame because I think it's a good place to keep them.
And because I am too lazy and unorganized to find another place to keep them.
And I like to pull them out each year and torture myself with the ridiculous rate of growing that they do each year.

Here. Have fun torturing yourself too ;)

He's about 18 months old in the middle pic.
It was right about here that he began to woo the ladies in this family.
It's been a downhill slippery slope ever since ;)

I remember the far left pic like it was yesterday. He was only 3.
When they handed it to me I started to cry because he looked so old.
I did that today too.

I thought my baby girl was so big in the first pic (far left).
What did I know?

I thought she was my last baby girl ;)
And again ...

What did I know?

PIGTAILS!

2011-04-27T22:16:00.001-04:00

So Clara is our first straight-haired girl, hence the very pointy pigtails. After doing her hair, we spent the remainder of the day trying to control ourselves because it was TOO MUCH.

As if she needed any help in the attitude department ...

Springtime!

2011-04-20T20:56:00.128-04:00

So I have had a love/hate relationship with blogging over the years. Between trying to steal away time to collect my thoughts and then finding the balance with completing them, all the while trying not to neglect my other responsibilities has proven to be a bit challenging.

Made obvious by my very extended blogging vacations ;)

Then there are the times when I attempt to journal without words, and I have painstakingly uploaded pictures, only to have them not show up where they should ... not to mention the time it takes uploading 5 pics at a time.

Mercy.

So while stealing away time is still practically impossible, I have found a solution to getting photos on the blog without it taking forever!

Yes! Uploading pictures is finally easier! It's probably been easier for a long long time but I only recently found out how to use Picasa to upload as many pictures as I want ... all at once ... instantly!

At the very least I will be able to update my blog with pictures to journal our days. Being able to revisit these days that are passing by so quickly is a very sweet blessing!

Chris picked this precious little picnic table up at Sam's and the whole thing folds
flat and is very light & portable. You really can't hate Virginia weather for too long
because then it goes and shows off with glorious spring days like this one.

Pollen Reaction :( Not as bad as last year but we are still trying to figure out how to manage this before the onset.
Once it gets the upper-hand, things quickly get out of control.

Hannah & her affinity for babies and the window seat :)

We take far too many pictures of her.
We like to take pictures.
Taking pictures of babies is the best.
And she makes an easy subject.

"COME ON ONE!"
We spend springtime cheering on this fella ...
This is his first year pitching and he has loved it!

Sunday Afternoon Make-up Game
So last year she sat in her stroller.
And that was SO last year.

It looks like they are running in opposite directions.
And so goes my life.

Coach Daddy

Might be one of my favorite pictures.
Sneak peeks of real life are beautiful to me.

And now for the photo montage of Clara and her face. The child has a vicious scowl like none of my other children but it can transform instantaneously and light up a room :)

November Hodge Podge - The Photo Shoot :)

2011-04-20T01:29:00.001-04:00

So where was I? Catching up on this year that has just about gotten away from me. What in the world???

Way back in November, Lea Ann (sweet, precious, everybody should have one but not everybody can be so lucky to have one, THAT Lea Ann) came to visit and took some precious pictures of mi familia and these are our first family pictures in about 10 years! What a gift! What a treasure! What better way to torture my husband!

It was nice to have Lea Ann's helping hand but it was even nicer to have her close enough to touch.

You know how sometimes when life gets really hard & you feel like you have just about unraveled yourself?

And then you have a conversation with someone who loves Jesus (and you) enough to begin that tedious mending process?

But you can't hold it together and stitch yourself up at the same time?

I am thankful for Lea Ann who has held me together more times than I can count while the Lord does the mendin'.

Clara is one!

He's a little bit proud of her.

We think it's very very cute when she cries.

She is very much not amused.

Yeah, it's a sweet picture. Too bad you can't hear the commentary ;)

That's my man.

My girls

Our kids have been friends since before forever.
It is such a sweet thing to see friendships that last.

Brothers

Sisters

This is Lea Ann
She sometimes holds me together
And she sometimes helps me cook dinner over the phone
And she reminds me how to love my husband like Jesus
And she never ever forgets my birthday
Even though I almost never remember hers
And she doesn't think passing gas is funny
Even though I do
And she talks me down off the ledge ...

Real friends never leave each other on the ledge

Her Sister ... once little now big

Friends ... also once little now big

Already, I see this and my heart aches for November.
Where on earth do the days disappear to?

It's good to be their momma ...
Even if I have to climb up on the ledge sometimes to see it :)

Pics (a test)

2011-04-19T07:54:00.000-04:00

Glimpses

2011-03-31T07:17:00.010-04:00

Football

Snacktime

His "Melancholy" Look

And His "Melancholy" Look

Sweet & Filthy

Stinker & Her Brother

Constant. Motion.

The "Tree" He Planted

Gigi & The Girls!

She's 14

She Thinks She's 14

Art

Joy

Stinker On The Run

Sweet Children

On The Lookout

Hard Knocks

Pretty Tomboy

A Year Ago?

2011-03-21T16:04:00.004-04:00

I've watched her get this big with my own two eyes and yet still find it very hard to believe.

Homeschool (and Life) Hodge Podge - October

2011-01-19T19:53:00.018-05:00

October was a busy month too!

I posted about these big events:

Baby girl had her first birthday

Carter Mountain

The Rangers went to the World Series!

We had more typical days

Some special days

The girls love their co-op classes:

School days at home have been hectic with two babies and a lot of driving. I am still trying to figure out how to strike the balance between the two and relish the season without constantly looking forward to when things are "easier".

Relishing

Hannah photographed her first wedding

Amphibians & Reptiles Field Trip

Pocahontas State Park

Does it not look like the woman is trying to get the turtle to "get" Jenn?

I love this picture with all my heart.

Benjamin had no fear of petting the snake ...

until right after this picture and the snake whipped him

in the eye with his tail. That kind of shook him up a little.

Squanto

Troy Polamalu

Pweewa the Duck

Cowboy Benjamin

Sweet evening-time with Daddy

Daylight Savings is not my friend :(

Dissecting owl pellets at Pocahontas State Park

for our lesson on birds

Sam giving his animal report

on the white wolf

Benjamin & Emily

(need I say more?)

Jenn saving my child from a near

fatal attack of mosquitos. NO KIDDING.

It started innocently enough while the kids

were on a scavenger hunt, when all of a sudden

we noticed the SWARMS of mosquitos everywhere!

We were at the bottom of this hill when it started and we had to

high-tail it back up ... and quick! Poor Benjamin is crazy sensitive

to mosquito bites! I have never seen anything like it in my life.

Homeschool Hodge Podge (September)

2011-01-09T22:12:00.008-05:00

Since I never post consistently and almost always start things that I don't finish, I figured it would be no big thing to just throw out some pics from our school year so far. I love looking back at my blog when I first started and it actually chronicled our life somewhat!

Here is a snapshot of September:

A VERY typical day

Great Wolf Lodge (yes, again)

VSU Little League Baseball Camp

County Fair (click for pics)

Carter Mountain (click for pics)

The Nina, The Pinta & The Santa Maria

Pamplin Park

Getting Ready for Football Season!

GO STEELERS!!!

School has been so much easier this year!

And ...

School has been so much harder this year!

I am beginning to think this must be the way it goes. Just about the time you figure some things out, you find yourself in the midst of brand new challenges that can seem insurmountable.

Thank goodness God is consistent with providing opportunities where we depend on His grace & provision and also consistent with meeting me where those opportunities collide with my very weak flesh. Who needs a new year to have a fresh start?

I need one every day.

Amen?

Where Pictures Tell The Story ...

2011-01-05T23:07:00.015-05:00

I can't count the number of conversations I have had with other mothers about the age difference between siblings and the matter of importance that this bears on a person's life ... both the life of the child & and life of the parent.

It is a complicated topic where I have seldom found someone without an opinion or more often a "personal" account of how it affected them as children.

You have the "I like to get it over with all at once" camp ... or the "I want them to be spread out so I can enjoy each of them".

Then there is the "I don't want an odd number of children because one will be left out".

Or how about, "I really want to have another (gender specific) *boy* or *girl* because they should really have a brother/sister.

I have had a TON of these conversations with mothers, both young & old, as well as mothers with children who are very close in age and those with children who are spread out.

Surely there are benefits to both and I can attest to some from both sides of the fence. And I don't think there is anything wrong with being deliberate about planning a family. I have just found it a bit disconcerting when folks find out how far apart our kids are and immediately their faces are somewhat forlorn and the conversation heads quickly in the direction of "better you than me".

I am just so grateful that statistics, personal accounts of siblings turned enemies, and my own flesh carried little weight when we made the decision to have more children, in spite of the age difference between our oldest and youngest.

And by the way, shhhh.... don't tell Samuel & Benjamin that they are 5 years apart ... they don't know they aren't supposed to be friends ;)

All this hot air to preface the following pictures of Clara ... who couldn't care less how old her siblings are but just that they allow her to ransack their rooms and have her way with their electronics.

Touch?

Ummm.... Touch like thisssss?

Reeeeeeeach and touch???

Two-finger touch!!!

The No-Look Touch.

Scuse me? Did you just say ... No touch?

Crazy Talk.

Humph.

Fine then. I will primp.

Hellooooo Gorgeousness!

Time for more touching!

Up close touch.

Again with the NO TOUCHING???

I can't believe I am getting to touch all this!

More primping.

The Jackpot of touching!!!

Giddy.

Come on Taylor Swift, don't fail me now!

My point to all that rambling up top is that I think (meaning: I hope and my heart says so) that sibling relationships that are healthy into adulthood have little to do with age difference and much more to do with a love and devotion that transcends the gaps.

Sisterly Love = Love & Devotion that transcends the gaps :)

Mercy Days Class of 2010-2011

2010-12-15T08:20:00.004-05:00

Clara Hope - 1 year

Benjamin - 2 years old

Samuel - 2nd grade

Emma - 8th grade

Hannah - 10th grade

Hannah & Emma's photography teacher, Cheryl Joyce, took these beautiful pictures! So thrilled to have them all taken at the same time. It was really a last minute decision and Cheryl did such a fabulous job making it happen :)

Thanksgiving 2010

2010-12-02T12:43:00.008-05:00

We had Chris' family here for Thanksgiving this year and having everyone together is such a rare event!

I am definitely a work in progress with the whole "hostess" thing, but living far away from our family has definitely encouraged me in the right direction. Having such hospitable friends here in Virginia has also been key in developing a love for sharing our home. I hope our family will look back on these sweet times and remember the blessing of family.

And because I delete all the pictures where I am speaking firmly to my children through gritted teeth, they should be none the wiser ;) Remind me to tell you sometime about how I had the camera on the tripod and set the timer as a test and then walked away to give my boys some correction ... you know the kind where words are not really necessary? Yeah, well I kind of accidentally caught that moment on film.

Needless to say that pic didn't make the cut.

Since the pics are numerous I will break it up and do a series of Thanksgiving posts. You all can wager on when I'll forget to keep posting.

Chris' brother Scott, and his wife Robin, drove up from New Orleans and spent the week with us. We met their insanely precious baby, Lili, for the first time.

See what I mean?

She stole a piece of our hearts when she left and I think being privy to so much of her daddy's life before she got here makes it all the sweeter.

Scott was about Hannah's age when Chris and I began dating and he has been like a brother to me the last 20 years. I have watched him grow from a mullet-headed punk to this adoring husband and daddy that loves his girls more than life.

He was always a doting uncle to my girls and so much of their early years are sprinkled with precious memories of him in their lives ... to the point that Emma listed: Dad, Mom, Hannah, Emma, & Uncle Scott on her family tree during preschool 10 years ago.

And believe me when I tell you that it was around that time that I was pretty-darn-well-certain that settling down and starting a family were not on the horizon for him. Of course I was plotting against his evil plans of Corvettes and lake houses with prayers and petitions to match.

So those prayers, combined with meeting sweet Robin, were too much for my bachelor brother-in-law to resist.

God's providence is so good!

And sweet Lili is such a reminder of His grace ...

Thankful ... Still

2010-12-02T00:34:00.006-05:00

It goes without saying that being busy (beyond belief) is a constant state of being for this family. I am coming to realize and finally concede that there is little that I am willing to do to change that.

Sounds crazy to embrace it and oftentimes (like tonight) I would rather give it a swift kick to the shins and curl tightly into a doodle-bug position and wait for the busy to pass on by.

To eliminate busy from our life would mean to bid farewell to so many things that make our life rich with experience ... relationships ... and growth in all sorts of areas.

With a heart that is heavy with the trappings of this world I am hoping to be deliberate in finding gratitude in all of it.

I am thankful to have a boy who loves to play sports ... not because it's sports but because he loves it.
I am thankful to have daughters who are busy with classes and activities and friends and jobs ... so busy that I am not here as often as I would like.
I am thankful for these little babies who keep my time at home hoppin' and while there is little reprieve, it is still a task that I would never want to relinquish and I daily purpose to relish.
I am thankful for a car (that I live in) that has air & heat and a seat for all my lovely kiddos.
I am thankful for events that make me rush to the grocery store and rush back and sweat and fume while preparing something edible and pleasing and then being surrounded by people who we love and who love us ... and how the grocery store trips and the dishes never seem to be the things we remember.
I am thankful that with grace there is forgiveness for all things. Ugly words. Ugly thoughts. Selfish acts. Even ungrateful hearts. I am thankful for this every single day.

I need to post some pictures from our precious Thanksgiving with our family but until then I will leave you with this absolutely delightful and almost-too-much montage of our Ben-Ben ... who has suddenly grown up way too fast.

Thankfulness ... 14

2010-11-22T15:17:00.012-05:00

So it's actually Day 22 and who knew I would fall so far behind so fast???

Well, probably everyone who knows my first and last name, but whatever. I am still thankful!

I often sit to write these posts, but I have so much more to say than I have time for, and I end up putting it off. Especially when my thankfulness is for something that is worth more than a few sentences ... like the gratitude for being part of a church family that loves the Lord.

Our journey in finding a church didn't take too long. We came to Grace Bible the very first Sunday after making our decision to leave Grace Fellowship. However, the spiritual and emotional journey took a bit longer. I wrote a little here and here.

Through the whole process we have found this to be true: Finding a church is hard.

It shouldn't be and I know the whole ordeal has been an incredible opportunity for growth and humility. Still, it is way too hard and no matter if or when we find ourselves on that journey again ... it will be too soon.

Our church isn't perfect. And those were the some of the first words we heard our pastor say to us when we met with the elders in October 2008. It was as if he thought we were looking for the perfect church!

How absurd!

(my tongue is in my cheek, just in case you didn't catch that)

He was right about our non-perfect church but thankfully since I am a bit far from perfect it appears I might fit right in. That whole "grace" thing plays a huge role in how I have handled (or not handled) the imperfections along the way.

We entered into a season of really digging for truth and understanding many years ago and much of that season involved a close examination of our present church in light of scripture. I found myself being very critical of churches that were missing components that we felt were non-negotiables.

Interesting how God has changed those non-negotiables without much consultation ... which has made things so much easier.

It wasn't really about me and my wants after all.

Or my children, my husband, service times, type of music, programs, building size, distance, or any other felt need that had seemed so crucial before.

I would encourage anyone in this same situation to really examine your heart in light of what the bible gives as the model for the New Testament church, careful to see the differences between convictions, preferences, and actual mandates given in the Word.

In doing so, you might find that your non-perfect church is something to be very grateful for.

Thankful ... Day 13

2010-11-21T19:40:00.004-05:00

Thankful for warm days in fall, fish that bite, and little boys who want to be just like their daddy.

Thankful ... Day 11 & 12

2010-11-13T21:20:00.015-05:00

This whole posting every day is really gaining on me! I hate falling behind because I could easily write about thankfulness all the live long day ... if I could find the time to write and then remember to do it!

Note to parents with younger children:

Buy period costumes while your kids are little. You WILL NOT regret it.

Ellerie the Indian girl

I am so thankful to have been so busy preparing for our Thanksgiving Feast with homeschooling friends that I haven't had time to write! So my gratitude turns towards the blessing of homeschooling ... the opportunities that we have within our community ... and the circle of women who choose this path and encourage me along the way.

What a glorious day!

Recipe for Pilgrim Hats (very yummy)

Jenn's cupcakes!

My blog sidebar is not updated with current curriculum posts and how things have gone this year. I have so much to share! If what I (or collectively - my experience combined with those who I am close friends with) could be a help to anyone else, I am blessed to share when I can find the time.

Coleman's awesome braids

Actin' like a bunch of Indians!

When I first began this journey about 4 years ago I relied heavily on the women who wrote about homeschooling on their blogs. Since then, those women have become busy (and busier) just like me and so writing has been scarce and sacred. Still, I cannot say enough about the kind of encouragement I have found from other bloggers who have been willing to share their hearts as they go ... even if those times are more rare these days.

Sarah Grace

One things that I purposed to do this year was to create more homeschooling days that I would want to remember ... that my kids would want to remember ... and that I would long to do over again.

Thanksgiving Bingo

I don't have to try too hard to create days that I would like to forget. They seem to happen just fine without much planning ;)

He was on the warpath for juice boxes.

Too many juice boxes.

So with that in mind, we feasted this past Friday with a precious group of Pilgrims & Indians. The kids made homemade butter, played Thanksgiving Bingo, and raised the cuteness meter to a whole new level.

Emily Joy

It was an absolutely splendid day with perfect weather, yummy food, and sweet friends. We are all thankful indeed.

Treat Bags

Menu: chicken nuggets, mac & cheese, sweet potato casserole, corn casserole, homemade rolls, broccoli casserole, veggie tray & dip, cupcakes, pilgrim hats
Games: Thanksgiving Bingo (we were also going to play pumpking bowling with 2-liters but they had so much fun just being together!) We also made homemade butter with whipping cream and baby food jars.
Costumes: Adorable! Some had costumes that were purchased and others made their own. The indian shirts my girls & Benjamin were wearing were a snap to make and what an easy & quick costume!
Next year: Can't wait! I hope to have the kids prepare a song to sing and also recite scripture about giving thanks. I had some craft ideas prepared but I sort of chickened out since this was my first shin-dig of this size.

Thankful ... Day 9 & 10

2010-11-11T13:46:00.002-05:00

It might be cheating to combine two days but I don't want to fall behind! Since I am listing more than one thing then surely this can count for two days ;)

I really did say out loud yesterday how thankful I was for all the conveniences available today for babies! Here are a few of my favorites:

Shopping Cart Covers - I bought my cover when Benjamin was little and I have used it so much these last few years, both in shopping carts and in high chairs. Soft & sanitary! I love that!

Awesome Diaper Bags - I love my bag. Period. End of Sentence.

Baby Monitors - with multiple receivers and really good digital feeds that DON'T pick up our neighbors private life (love you Amy but boundaries are good, right?)

High Chairs - that don't take up space.

The Ergo - can't say enough about how wonderful this carrier is! I have a great sling for when they are smaller but I cannot imagine my crazy life without this!

I know these are all luxuries and that makes me all the more thankful. I did most of my shopping when the girls were small at resale stores and hoped for great hand-me-downs (which I got!). It is nice to be able to have some of these things for Clara & Benjamin and I really enjoy being able to share them with other moms.

Thankful ... Day 8

2010-11-08T23:13:00.004-05:00

I am thankful for the beauty of changing seasons. When we moved here 11 years ago, I could not even fathom that I would love Virginia as much as I do.

And even though it was fall, I don't really remember noticing the beauty like I do now.

It was probably because of all the sobbing.

Once that subsided and I conceded that we were here to stay ... at least for a while, I began to warm up to the notion that autumn was more than just a vocabulary word and a date on the calendar.

All those things I read about in science about leaves turning different colors and the temperatures dropping (and staying that way) actually happen here in Virginia! No pool parties at Thanksgiving anymore ;)

Don't get me wrong. I love my Texas.

Forever and ever.

But these fall days in Virginia are something to behold ... and I am so thankful to have them!

Thankful ... Day 7

2010-11-07T22:01:00.003-05:00

I am thankful for Sunday night and the time to pause ... take a deep breath ... and say Amen.

What a precious weekend!

Thankful ... Day 6

2010-11-06T08:36:00.009-04:00

I am thankful for friends I don't deserve.

My friends are faithful and kind.
They are patient (glory) and they are understanding (hallelujah).
They "get" me ... and somehow (by God's grace) they still love me.
My friends are mothers (been there) and wives (done that).
My friends love Jesus. That totally affects the above.
They have seen me cry ... a lot.
They have made me laugh ... even more.
These friends hold me accountable to truths that I don't want to face. I think I am most grateful for that.
My friends are forgiving. That has a lot to do with loving Jesus.

This precious friend will be here in just a few hours. She loves Jesus as much as anyone I have ever known. Do you know how much that affects a relationship?

I cannot think of a single transgression that she has ever kept against a person in her life (this is a real bonus as her friend).

I do not think I have ever seen her show anger (she claims to have bouts of it in private but I am not so sure).

She has loved her husband and modeled for me what it means to surrender and submit to the beautiful covenant that is marriage ... holiness not happiness. What a blessing to see God be glorified in such a precious couple.

Her influence as a mother to her own children has impacted my life more than anyone or anything apart from Jesus.

My son crawled in bed early this morning before the sun had really come up. He whispered in my ear ...

"Momma ... can you wake me up early tomorrow? Can you wake me up so I can come downstairs when La La is here? I like to sit with her in the chair while she reads her bible."

I wonder if he knows how much she faithfully prayed for him before he was even born?

" ... and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled." - Titus 2: 4 & 5

Thankful ... Day 5

2010-11-05T17:00:00.000-04:00

I am thankful for hot baths. Sounds trite but I am telling you that if I am away from home and cannot take a hot bath, I will miss that more than my own bed.

Some of you so-called friends of mine like to call these my "granny baths".

Whatever.

I like to call them boiling hot therapy sessions in which my skin may or may not incur 2nd degree burns.

Thankful ... Day 4

2010-11-04T07:51:00.008-04:00

Life is hard. Too hard. Harder than it looks and just when you think it is getting easier ... it gets hard again.

I have never been one to surrender easily except when it comes to surrendering to the flesh. I am very much the quitter when faced with fighting sin and too often I have waved the white flag with eagerness and given victory to the one who seeks to kill, steal and destroy.

I am grateful that in the face of adversity ... during the hard days and nights of parenting, marriage, & life that the Lord will take up my fight and claim victory for HIS glory.

Thankful ... Day 3

2010-11-03T07:25:00.010-04:00

I am thankful for Clara Hope and the gift of having more children than we "planned" earlier in our marriage. There are no words for the gratitude I have for God moving in our hearts and causing us to reevaluate what He desired for us rather than how we "felt" about our family size.

Disclaimer: This is not about quiver-full. Not EVEN going there ;)

I am just saying that ultimately there are things in life that should never be left up to just how we feel. Since feelings are most often centered around us.

I have felt like making some pretty intense decisions in my life only to find out later that my heart was changed and therefore so did my outlook. Including the Lord in decisions that ultimately belong to Him has given me (us) a much greater peace during the process and a greater faith in His perfect provision over our lives.

Children are a blessing. No debate. The bible says so. No matter how many children you have, if you are reading this blog I would be fairly certain that you would agree. My encouragement would be to pray earnestly about being dependent on the Lord for guidance in this area and making decisions that give honor and glory to Him.

Being thankful for Clara had to include our dependence on Him in growing our family.

Without that we would not have the joy that is her life, today!

Thankful ... Day 2

2010-11-02T08:22:00.006-04:00

I am thankful for motherhood.

I love how God takes a young girl (either in spirit or in age) and uses that firstborn baby to transform her life.

I remember coming home with Hannah with a very preconceived and haughty opinion of what this whole mothering gig would look like. I also remember cramming her carseat in the back of my two-door sports car (because it was PLENTY big!) and dressing her like she was headed to a wedding, all the while sweating buckets because it was 86 degrees in the middle of February and my nerves were a teensy bit shot.

And after the first sleepless night without my mother-in-law, I cried for what must have been 16 hours straight.

Wow. Talk about a reality check.

And the incessant worrying? Have mercy on my soul, I worried myself into a knot more times than I can count! I have diagnosed each of my first three children with at least one life-threatening illness only to have my pediatrician laugh behind his clipboard.

Having more babies has been such a soothing balm to that worried momma.

You really do live to tell about ... at least the parts you can remember, and those are few and far between.

So fast-forward almost 16 years and four more babies. My sage wisdom from those years?

Sleeping through the night is most definitely *not* the most worrisome thing.

And ...

Trust and obey the Lord.

Motherhood has been the vessel that God has used to strip me ... again and again of any self-worth that I struggle to keep.

I am grateful that God is faithful to labor with me as I continually purge the sins of selfishness, pride, fear, and more (and more).

Thankful ... Day 1

2010-11-01T09:10:00.006-04:00

DAY 1

I am thankful because I have a heart that has been given the grace to do so.

Without God's sovereign work in my life ... in my heart ... there would be an absence of gratitude in my life for what only He could have done. Knowing that even my desire to be grateful is a gift of grace that comes only because God has redeemed my life ... now and forever.

I am very thankful.

Homeschooling ... Part 4

2010-10-24T07:51:00.009-04:00

Thought I'd forget didn't ya!

Well, I knew it would take a while for me to get back around to the Q & A that I started a while back ;)

One of the questions from the comments of my original post was more than I could take on at the time. It is a great comment and I could more easily converse about this in person rather than give a one-sided answer. Since that isn't an option I am giving it my best shot. Here is the comment:

I really enjoyed reading "Why we homeschool." It was a humble take on it. So often I feel like homeschool parents are very prideful about their decision to HS. My question is maybe more of a comment that perhaps you could respond to. I don't mean this to be a discouragement, but my observation is that the average highschooler in HS is no closer to God than the public schooler. In fact, I have noticed an apathy towards the Lord among these, and I know their parents are very upset about their children's worldliness. This is the number one reason that I am turned off to homeschooling. The public school'd kids who were raised by Christian parents seem to have so much more boldness for Christ and have had to chose God or the world in a practical sense, leaving little room for "lukewarm." I am open to being persuaded. How would you respond to my concerns in this area? Thank you

My first response would be to your comment about the lack of humility in homeschool parents. I couldn't agree more!

About parents in both camps.

Because I have been a parent in both camps ... with a huge deficit in humility.

Art Class

If you talk to the average public school parent (with no homeschoolers in ear-shot) they will make a very bold and clear assertion that homeschooling is by no means a viable method of educating children. They boast in their own experiences and are quick to point out that "family" that they know who homeschooled and their kids can't read, aren't groomed, can't socialize and are building bombs in the backyard.

The average homeschool parent can be just as bold and arrogant with their assertions about the secret intentions of the government with their secular agenda (pause here to insert that I do not fall into this camp and if it weren't so bizarre it might be funny), the number of teens who are public schooled and pregnant, on drugs, can't read, aren't socialized and are also building bombs in the backyard.

Story Time

I am not proud to have been so brazen at different points along this journey but I know that I have. Humility is most definitely the greatest work of sanctification in my life and I need a healthy dose every single ~~day~~ minute.

As far as the homeschooled high schoolers who show apathy towards the Lord ... really no evidence of conversion? The heart issue of teens is no different than the heart issue of any sinful man who has no faith in Christ. Some are better at feigning their allegiance than others but there is most definitely a very small number of devoted believers among teens ... at least as far as I can tell.

I am not clear if these high schoolers you mentioned are being observed in church or in school. If in church then it would seem to me that more homeschooled kids are being brought to church whether they choose to go or not (on average). If I were to gather 30 public-schooled kids from my neighborhood and 30 kids who are homeschooled there would be a much higher percentage of the homeschooled kids who go to church each Sunday.

Which by no means is a reflection of how many are actually Christ-followers.

Morefield Mines

However, if I were to take the neighborhood kids who do attend church faithfully (while it would be a much smaller percentage of the whole), it has been my experience that a greater portion of that percentage have a true desire to be there. I am not sure if the boldness is a reflection of being public schooled but I can see how dealing with the adversity and the demands of facing opposition could bring you to a place of greater need.

A need for Jesus.

Thankfully, neither the Christian homeschool or the government public school can be credited for our response to the gospel, because we are wretched and lost ... either way.

-Psalm 14: 2-3

For certain, I do believe that you may be able to better discern the sheep from the goats in a school environment I don't necessarily believe you will find more sheep there. And on the same note, my heart is broken for teens in the church, the lack of true biblical teaching, discipline, and parental involvement.

Broken.

Recess

If we were chatting together, I would agree with you about your observations and concerns. It still does not negate what I see as a mandate for teaching and raising my children. There are absolutely no guarantees outside of God's grace. While I hope that raising my children and giving them more opportunity to study the Word of God and pray together as a family and nurture them in their relationships with one another will result in the blessing of having them believe in faith that Christ is their savior ... my greatest hope is that doing this will bring glory to God and that I am obedient in the task.

I know without question that there are people ... dear friends ... who love Jesus and their children just as much as I love mine and spend a great deal of time (more than me) praying for them and being Christ-like examples for their family ... and send their kids to public school.

And if their kids grow up and their hearts are turned to God and they devote themselves to live for Christ then it will most certainly be because of God's grace and not because their parents prayed more than me ... or because they had a more bold testimony during their high school years.

And if my kids grow up and their hearts are turned to God and they devote themselves to live for Christ then it will most certainly be because of God's grace and not because we homeschooled.

It would be prideful for a parent or child to believe that their salvation is credited in any part because of how they were raised.

Make no mistake about my heart on this. Homeschooling is without question the hardest and best decision we have made as a family. It is an incredible privilege and I am humbled to be brought alongside the Lord as He deepens my faith through the humility of knowing that ultimately they are His.

Point of Rocks

All we can really do is seek to obey Him and with faith live out that obedience with joy.

Thank you so much for asking a hard question that I am sure others have wanted to ask. I love to talk about our homeschooling journey so thank you also for the opportunity to search my heart and be reminded of the real reasons behind our decision.

Blessings!

Happy Birthday Clara Hope!

2010-10-21T22:26:00.004-04:00

Claws UP!

2010-10-20T20:00:00.000-04:00

Even though Dad brought us our t-shirts from Texas in time, the Claw did no good tonight! We are all loaded up with Ranger gear for Friday's game though!

Papa

2010-10-20T07:54:00.007-04:00

We got one of those calls last week that makes your heart sink and your face goes numb. Chris' dad was at the hospital in Fort Worth having emergency bypass surgery for 90% blockage in his arteries.

Today, not even a week later, he is recovering and making remarkable progress! We are grateful for God's mercy in allowing his condition to be made known before he had a heart attack ... which was an inevitable consequence if this surgery was not performed when it was.

Chris and his two brothers were able to be with their dad in the past few days as he was recovering. What a bittersweet time for the four of them to be together. While we all know that life is fragile it does always seem to take something like this to be reminded.

When Lynn (PaPa) was here this summer, Hannah made this video for him to take home since he doesn't really have internet access (gasp!) We are all so glad you are okay PaPa and getting stronger every day! We love you!

Carter Mountain

2010-10-02T09:51:00.009-04:00

The weather was perfect! We had much needed rain all week and it let up just in time for our trip up to Carter Mountain. It is just about an hour and half from here, in Charlottesville. We haven't been for two years and I am always reminded when we head west on 64 what a beautiful part of the country we live in!

We met up with other homeschooling friends and had a great day!

Apple Pickin' Today!

2010-10-01T07:40:00.002-04:00

We are headed here today for apple pickin' with friends :) We went with friends two years ago.

I have to admit, I am almost as excited about the backdrop (pictures!) as I am about the apples ;)

Almost felt like Fall today ...

2010-09-27T20:23:00.009-04:00

We had the hottest summer on record here in Virginia and have only had a sprinkling of mild days the entire month of September. Today was rainy and the temperature was pleasant. The leaves seem to have made up their mind and have started the process of changing.

It was the perfect day for the boys to put on their boots and head outside. I am almost certain Benjamin tried to eat something that was covered in mud. Either way they both had a glorious time ;) So much so, that we didn't even pick up with lessons in the afternoon for Samuel.

School is going ~~well~~

School is going ~~good~~

School is going ~~okay~~

School is going.

Honestly, all added up, we have more above average days than not. It's the moments that don't always deserve the honorable mention.

The running late, overwhelmed, baby screaming, toddler screaming, momma screaming, no dinner cooked, laundry heap, Algebra II makes me twitch, scary car smell (like is something dead in here?), no make-up, NO 6+6 DOES NOT EQUAL 66, are you serious?, you gotta be kidding me!, I'm not gonna tell you again!, Help me Jesus ... moments.

Moments.

I cannot ever recall being more tired in my entire life and newborn babies can't touch this kind of tired. At least then the entire world gives you a reprieve ;) When you homeschool, the entire world gives you the "I told you so" and besides I can't act like this whole shindig is impossible or else they'll be right!

But they are right ... sometimes.

It really is impossible.

And God is all about impossible. You know He has done more miraculous things than help a homeschool mom get through her day ;)

But there are days when it does seem to be a supernatural occurrence when we all make it through the day alive. I started homeschooling three years ago and if I have learned anything at all in that time, it is that this whole process has little to do with academics.

Like I just told Samuel today during our little Wigwam making party that it was all about attitude not about the craft.

I may have said it more like, "WE CAN MAKE 72 OF THESE BLASTED WIGWAMS OR WE CAN FINISH THIS ONE. EITHER WAY, YOU WILL DO IT WITH A GOOD ATTITUDE BECAUSE MAKING WIGWAMS IS FUN! YOU GOT IT?"

See what I mean?

So after the Battle at Little Wigwam we booted up and went outside. All kinds of miraculous things happen when my boys go outside and they are able to "release their wiggles".

It's almost supernatural ;)

Clara Hope

2010-09-27T08:41:00.003-04:00

She is almost a year old.

She is almost walking.

She is almost spoiled rotten.

O.K. she is spoiled rotten ... and yes, those cheeks are as delicious as they look.

The County Fair

2010-09-25T08:28:00.007-04:00

Firetrucks ... The Love Affair

2010-09-23T20:53:00.008-04:00

A small fire in the woods the behind our neighbor's house brought the local fire department out.

Of course, Benjamin will only remember that it was just the best day of his life.

Oh yeah baby! It's that time again!

2010-09-22T07:31:00.003-04:00

A Precious Peek ...

2010-09-21T20:49:00.002-04:00

Not done yet but much closer than before. We (as in Hannah) are planning on painting some canvases to match the bedding and I haven't figured out curtains or the dresser just yet.

Emma really showed her skills with painting the room and by the time Hannah joined in, I realized I had nothing to worry about the next time something needed painting around here!

Much more precious for our sweet Clara ... who is thinking really hard about walking these days!

Day 4 ... It's Still Summer and I Don't Care What Ya'll Say!!!

2010-08-25T09:07:00.010-04:00

I can't believe I posted yesterday and failed to mention Benjamin's attempt to take Emma's fish for a walk OR the horrible mosquito bites that he got a few days ago on his calves (probably 7 or 8 total) that initially looked as though he had been shot (hot, red, swollen) and then progressed to looking like he had been eaten by piranhas (because he had scratched them open). I have kept them bandaged and used antibiotic cream. They are better each day but I am still thinking I should take him in today. No fever but sort of blistery looking. I hate the guessing game and I really hate throwing away $25. I will assess in a bit and see how they look this morning.

I have a couple of new curriculum's this year that are stumping me. I wish I knew someone else who had used them and could walk me through. Anybody out there used Sequential Spelling or Geography Matters?

Today includes:

Sam's Club
Wal-Mart
Three loads of laundry
Sorting and delivering maternity clothes
30 minutes of exercise
Tacos & rice for dinner
Hannah driving with Dad this evening
Finish the boys room (the biggie)

I MUST finish organizing the boys room. I found a free dresser that someone gave away on the local homeschool forum that will go in their closet. Chris is going to reconfigure the giant shelving unit to eventually house more books but I can't wait until then to make the room more toddler-friendly. I use door knob covers to keep Benjamin in the room at night and I will use those same covers for the closet door so that Samuel can put his things in the closet that he doesn't want Benjamin to have.

I need to take the plunge and start painting Clara's room. It's super big and it includes the ceiling so I am a little intimidated. I put the pics on here (it's blue now) and my semi-professional painting friend, Tiffany said I should prime first. I am painting the room a VERY pale pink and the guy at Benjamin Moore talked me out of primer. I am thinking I will regret not priming it. Today I am taping it off ... it's a start. Clara has precious bedding but is sleeping in Benjamin's crib among the locomotives. No big deal, right?

I don't need perfection. But I do prefer some order.

However.

The Lord is painfully teaching me that my preferences *seldom* fall in line with His desires for my life. When I think I need things like:

a good night's sleep
peace & quiet
a day without arguments
a day without poop diapers
time to exercise
a date night
or a Chipotle burrito

I am reminded that God's provision is perfect. There is not a single thing lacking in my life apart from my lack of obedience to the Lord. If He (the creator of Heaven & Earth) ordained a day of peace & quiet or a night without interruption then it would be so.

I do find rest in knowing that my To-Do list is always subject to the Lord's approval.

Day 3 or 4? ... tick, tock, tick, tock

2010-08-24T08:17:00.008-04:00

A very brief review ...

Sunday & Monday:

Church - almost on time
A fairly quiet Sunday afternoon - worked on some school stuff
Grilled out Sunday night - yummy!
Bedtime has been somewhat challenging with Benjamin - mornings even harder since he is waking at about 5:45 every.single.day (we've been here before with Samuel)
Clara is sleeping through the night in the crib - it's a trade off and I'll take it!
A couple of loads of laundry and the girls had haircuts last night (Emma is already growing hers back out so she needed a trim to start the process)
Made my way through the curriculum yesterday - finished this reading list for Sam

I'll share it here because I absolutely love book lists and maybe there will be something here that someone else can use. Plus I can type it up once and have it printed to add to and take with me to the library. Some are read alouds (me to Sam), some are read alouds (Sam to Ben) but the majority Samuel will read aloud to me or on his own. To save time, they are in no order. The majority are part of our history study this year ... some are recommended reading with My Father's World, some are on the Sonlight list and a few others I have picked up along the way. I am trying to post more frequently but in an effort to not get "stuck" I am limiting the time I spend editing my posts so forgive my spelling, por favor.

If there are any 2nd or 3rd grade books that you love or American History books that would Sam would love, do tell! Here is the list so far:

A Picture Book of George Washington

Turkeys, Pilgrims, & Indian Corn - Barth

The Hundred Dresses - Estes

Blaze & The Lost Quarry - Anderson

Hero Tales - Jackson

Frog & Toad

Henry and Mudge and the Starry Night

Mary on Horseback - Wells

Tornado - Byars

Tippy Lemmey - McKissack

In Grandma's Attic - A. Richardson

The Boxcar Children #1

Prairie School

Long Way to a New Land - Sandin

Keep the Light Burning Abbie - Roop

The Long Way Westward - Sandin

The Thanksgiving Story - Dalgliesh

North American Indians - Gorsline

Twenty & Ten - Bishop

Riding the Pony Express - Bulla

Squanto - Bulla

The 4th of July Story - Dalgeish

The Courage of Sarah Noble - Dalgliesh

Sarah Whitcher's Story - Yates

The Story of the Election of Abraham Lincoln

Red, White, & Blue

If you Lived in Williamsburg in Colonial Days - Brenner

On the Banks of Plum Creek - Wilder

Mountain Born

Farmer Boy - Wilder

Clara and the Bookwagon -

Third Grade Detectives - Stanley

The Peanut Butter Kid - Bulla

The Secret Valley - Bulla

Cora Frear - Goodman

Henry & Ribsy - Cleary

The Children of Noisy Village

Viking Adventure - Bulla

A Picture Book of Christopher Columbus - Adler

The Jamestown Colony - Sakurai

Small Wolf - Benchley

If You Lived with the Hopi - Kamma

If You Lived with the Iroquois - Levine

Sarah Morton's Day: A Day in the Life of a Pilgrim Girl - Waters

Samuel Eaton's Day: A Day in the Life of a Pilgrim Boy - Waters

If you Sailed on the Mayflower - McGovern

Benjamin Franklin - D'Aulaire

Sam the Minuteman - Benchley

George the Drummer Boy - Benchley

Mary Geddy's Day: A Colonial Girl in Williamsburg - Waters

A Picture Book of Thomas Jefferson - Adler

The Magic Schoolbus at the Waterworks - Cole

Eli Whitney - Latham

Johnny Appleseed - Harrison

Johnny Appleseed (poetry) - Lindbergh

First Questions & Answers about Animals - Gutelle

What is the Animal Kingdom? - Crabtree

A Picture Book of Lewis and Clark - Adler

By Dawn's Early Light - Kroll

The Star-Spangled Banner - Spier

Robert Fulton - Henry

Going West - Leeuwen

Carolina's Courage - Yates

First Questions & Answers About the Human Body - Gutelle

Samuel Morse and the Telegraph - Quackenbush

Cora Frear: A True Story - Goodman

Gold Fever - Kay

Lewis & Papa: Adventure on the Santa Fe Trail - Joosse

Wagon Train: Kramer

A Picture Book of Abraham Lincoln - Adler

Abraham Lincoln - d'Aulaire

Sweet Clara and the Freedom Quilt - Hopkinson

Escape North! The Story of Harriet Tubman - Kulling

A Picture Book of Robert E. Lee - Adler

If you Lived at the Time of the Civil War - Moore

Iron Horses - Kay

So You Want to Be an Inventor? - St. George

First Flight - Shea

Thomas Edison - Nirgiotis

Take Me Out to the Airfield! - Quakenbush

We'll Race You Henry - Mitchell

A is for America - Scillian

One Nation - Scillian

Day 2

2010-08-21T22:03:00.004-04:00

I never said I would post every day but look! It's day 2 and here I am!

I think with the late hour and the headache my ponytail is giving me, I will organize my thoughts with bullets tonight. The dots help me find my place.

I went to bed last night with a headache and both ears hurting too (very strange for me) and the house was a complete disaster. I had taken the girls shopping and to spend the night with friends and by the time I got home and cared for the younger set, it was late, I was tired, and the house suffered for it.
Little did I know, Chris stayed up for the better part of the night cleaning. The kitchen alone was a booger but the man also organized and cleaned the playroom ... he sorted the cars by size (it's not contagious) and man-handled some GIANT hair/dust balls. If any of you have hardwood throughout your house you understand what I am talking about. It is crazy how big those suckers can get!
I woke up thinking that I could *maybe* clean the kitchen while he was gone fishing but not expecting to accomplish much. I wrangled Benjamin for a bit (which became the theme for the day) and came downstairs and began singing praises to my dear husband.
Since the house was straight I was able to sit down and start to ~~convulse~~ go over my curriculum and figure out what I still needed.
I am convinced ~~that I will never be able to do this~~ that if I am diligent these next couple of weeks I will be ready.
I am also delusional.
I ran a few errands this afternoon. Picked up a prescription for Vitamin-D and a new set of dentures.
Kidding on the second part but who my age needs Vitamin-D for crying out loud? I am telling you that I don't think summer visited my soul this year and my ghostly white legs are a testament to that.
I totally snuck in some phone calls while I was out running errands because I didn't have Cagney & Lacey with me listening in, taking notes, and reporting my crime ;) It's hard to have a ~~juicy~~ decent conversation with teenage girls around ;)
I rearranged Benjamin's attitude at least 42 times and pleaded with God for his salvation ... you know just in case.
I marinated chicken but picked up Japanese instead.

As the day is coming to an end, I plan on working through a bit more of the curriculum pile and then heading to bed before 8/22. I have been watching the calendar change days way too much lately. I am an early morning girl with early morning kiddos. Late nights are tempting but not healthy for me.

Tomorrow is the day that the Lord has made ... I will rejoice and be glad in it.